The scene was several months back, near the beginning of 2015. My friends Ike and Nathaniel hadn’t been able to have a good 40k night for a while, and we only had a short window of time before we had to go back to our respective classes and jobs, so we decided to make the most of what time we had. Nathaniel counted up his entire 40k collection, came out with about 4.5k points worth of models, and we decided on a 2-vs-1 "not-Apoc" match, me and Ike versus Nathaniel, with 5,000 points on each side. Me and Ike split 2,500 points.
The "Fluff" side was played by me and Ike, with Iron Hands Marines and Orks for Ike, and Necrons and an Inquisitorial detachment for me. The dubious REASONS! were that the Iron Hands were temporarily allying with the Lahkers to fight the greater enemy, and that the Inquisitor had come along to study the enemy and keep an eye on the Marines, and the Orks just dropped in because boyz gonna fight. The "NotFluff" side was every last 40k model Nathaniel owned jammed into a bizarre, unwieldy, unexplained, glorious infantry-heavy army. There was no excuse offered or made for the Eldar-Deldar-Tau-Tyranid mashup. It existed simply to be the opposing number of the "Fluff" army.
My list.
My list.
Ike's list
Ork detachment:
Big Mek with Kustom Force Field, 'eavy Armor, 3x ammo runts
Big Trakks w/Supa-Kannons
Warboss w/Power Klaw, Bosspole, Kombi-skorcha, 5x Nobz w/'eavy armor, all in Trukk
25x Boyz w/Bosspole Nob
10x Boyz w/Bosspole Nob
10x Boyz
3x Deffkoptas
Aegis Defence Line with Quad Gun
Clan Raukaan Iron Hands detachment:
Jump pack Chapter Smasher with Gorgon's Chain, Relic Blade, Power Fist
10x Jump Marines
5x Tactical Marines w/Missile Launcher
5x Tactical Marines w/flamer, Sarge has combi-melta, in Razorback w/heavy bolter
Ironclad Dreadnought
Venerable Dreadnought
Nathaniel's list
Eldar:
Iyanna Arienal (from 2E lore)
Farseer
Spiritseer
Baharroth
12x Guardian Defenders w/Bright Lance platform
12x Guardian Defenders w/Bright Lance platform
5x Dire Avengers
5x Rangers
5x Wraithguard w/wraithcannons
5x Wraithblades w/ghost axe and force shield
2x War Walkers
6x Bashees with Jain Zhar in Wave Serpent
6x Harlequins (includes Solitaire)
2x Harlequin Skyweavers
Dark Eldar:
Lady Aurelia Malys (from 5E)
Succubus w/Animus Vitae, 9x Bloodbrides, all in Raider
10x Wyches
10x Kabalite Warriors
12x Kabalite Warriors
12x Kabalite Warriors
12x Kabalite Warriors
4x Reaver Jetbikes
Ravager
Tau:
Commander Shadowsun w/3x drones, two MX52 Shield drones, one Command-Link drone
Crisis suit w/2x Shield drones
12x Fire Warriors w/2x Shield drones
10x Pathfinders w/pulse carbines and 3x drones, one Grav-Inhibitor, one Pulse Accelerator, one Recon
Riptide w/2x shielded Missile drones
Tyranids:
3x Warriors
12x Hormagaunts
Mission was Big Guns Never Tire, deployment Hammer & Anvil. I rolled Immortal Hubris for Warlord Rynkelyh. Me and Ike won the initiative and chose to deploy first.
Deployment
...took two hours. It was a fun two hours, though, we stood around and chatted while setting up. The Lahkers set up in the center and right flank, with the Annihilation Barge overseeing our left flank. The Orks set up mostly on our left flank, with the Deff Dred and Warboss in his Trukk on our right. The Big Mekk and the two Big Trakks, armed with Supa-Kannons, sat back by the hill and the Quad-gun. Kobeh, the mega-killy overlord, sat in the center with the Cryptek and a warrior blob, while the Warlord (Rynkelyh) hid off on the right flank with the Immortals. The Iron Hands deployed fairly even across the zone, with the jump Marines and the Raukaan Chapter Smasher (Gorgon's Chain, Relic Blade, Power Fist) deploying directly behind my Legolith.
Nathaniel then set up, in no particular formation. The Wraith units set up in his center, the Tyranids, Riptide, Shadowsun, and most of the Eldar and Tau on his left flank, and the Dark Eldar and a few Tau on his right flank. His new Harlequins were on the left flank, his Rangers in the center on the building's roof. Lyanna was hanging out by the Wraithblades, and he held Baharroth and a Raider with Wyches (who had the Animus Vitae) in reserve.
Ike used his warlord trait to hold two blobs of boyz back to infiltrate and immediately regretted it, once he realized how little space he had to deploy in. The boyz ended up squeezing into tiny spots behind the ruins. Nathaniel infiltrated his single squad of Pathfinders behind the tall flat ruin on his side, and failed to steal the initiative.
GAME TURN 1
Turn 1 - Fluff
The glorious collision of armies began with said armies struggling to overcome their collective inertia. Not much happened, what shooting the Fluff side did do killed all but two of Nathaniel's Hormagaunts, and that was about it. A traffic jam developed on the Fluff right, with the Legolith, Deff Dred, Transcendent C'tan, Ironclad Dreadnought, and Inquisitorial Rhino vying for right-of-way in an uncontrolled intersection. The Warboss's trukk ran straight up our right flank, and parallel-parked to block the path of the Fire Prism.
Turn 1 - NotFluff
Nathaniel's first turn, he did his share of shuffling forward, and then went into the the usual Eldar cheese wheel of powers, Guide, Doom, Horrify, etc. There was mild concern among the Orks when the Harlequin Skyweavers moved into the center and joined the boyz in the tall ruins. Nathaniel unleashed a large blast weapon (the name of which I failed to record) that was deadly enough to force the other boyz in the shorter ruins to go to ground. The Harlequins moved up on their left flank and shot at the Fire Trukk, and...BS9 model with a haywire grenade versus AV10 armor rolled a 1 to pen. Nathaniel was not happy. He was even less happy when the rest of his AT weapons flubbed their armor pen rolls against the Trukk, forcing him to reallocate anti-infantry weapons to finally wreck it, thus getting First Blood. The Warboss and his Nobz piled out, and were immediately assaulted by the Harlequins and the surviving 'nid Warriors. The Wraithlord strode into the center field and went toe-to-toe with my Canoptek Wraiths.
GAME TURN 2
Turn 2 - Fluff
At the four-hour mark, the second game turn began. Me and Ike's first concern was resolving the traffic jam on our right flank.
We couldn't.
The Deff Dred ended up stuck behind the Legolith and C'tan, if I remember rightly. There were no rules for road rage attacks, so we lucked out there. Forward progress in general, by any unit, was hampered by the sheer number of models. The Ironclad, Tomb Blades, and Triarch Stalker managed to work out a conga-line formation, and Warlord Rynkelyh found his Destroyers and that pesky Inquisitor's Rhino using him and his Immortals for a cover save. The warrior blob in the center stayed in the ruins, strangely reluctant to close with the S5 T6 Wraithblades...in hindsight, they had Kobeh, who had the Nightmare Shroud, Veil of Darkness, and Voidreaper (+2 armor, one-use Deep Strike, and extra-killy warscythe for those unfamiliar with Necrons). He probably could've killed the Wraithblades while using the warriors as meat shields, but alas, I was too chicken to try it, so we will never know...
Anyway. The Big Trakks killed the enemy Spiritseer and several Wraithguard. The Destroyers and plasma-gunner in the Inquisitorial Rhino opened up on the Ravager, damaged it, and stunned its crew. The Transcendent C'tan wiped out the remaining Wraithguard, and the Chapter Smasher, assault Marines, and Wraiths moshed the Wraithlord to death.
In the midst of all this, the last two surviving Hormagaunts huddled under the hill and waited out the carnage around them.
Turn 2 - NotFluff
Game turn 2's pyshic phase was not kind to Lyanna. She suffered Perils and took a wound, but did put a wound on my Wraiths with Eldritch Storm. The winged Eldar hero Baharroth arrived from reserve, sailed over the battlefield, and dropped his one-use grenade pack on the Orks in the tall ruins. I think he killed a few of them, but not enough for any major impact, my notes say nothing else about it. The Raider outflanked on our right flank, near the Monolith, Destroyers, and Rynkelyh. The Wych leader fired the Animus Vitae off, and pushed Power from Pain forward one turn.
My C'tan went down raging from massed shuriken fire from Eldar Guardians and Kabalites. A Guardian weapons team took the final hull point from the Legolith, and it became a permanent traffic obstacle. Ike's vanilla Dreadnought, name of Don, charged the Wraithblades, killed one, and then was slain in glorious close combat. On our right flank, Lord Nahz, chilling with the other Immortal squad, was accosted by the Harlie Party. The Solitaire challenged Nahz, the two dueled, and the assault was tied and went on. On the other side of the board, Reaver jetbikes ripped through the Ork boyz holding the flank; however, the last remaining boy rolled insane heroism on his morale check, and locked the whole Reaver squad in combat.
An intermission was taken for the night, and the game continued next morning.
GAME TURN 3
Turn 3 - Fluff
By game turn 3 the action had definitely moved to the middle and upper portions of the battlefield. The Fluff center and right flanks continued to advance wherever possible. Our left flank was held only by the 20-boy Ork blob and the Razorback. The Deff Dred closed in on the Fire Warriors and my Tomb Blades (blinded, by the way, I think by Baharroth's descent) homed in on the War Walkers. The shooting started, and the Inquisition warband hopped out of their Rhino, and the Inquisitor used the Tome of Venthric to use Split Fire against the nearby Raider and Baharroth. The plasma-gun acolyte rolled To Hit, got snake eyes, rolled for armor save, and failed both. His grisly failure inspired the rest of the acolytes to take Baharroth down to 1 wound. The Ravager was destroyed a minute later, most likely by the Destroyers, Immortals or Stalker. The blinded Tomb Blades failed to injure the War Walkers or anything else. The Deff Dred mowed down the unfortunate Fire Warrior squad, the Canoptek Wraiths killed the Wraithblades, but let Lyanna slip through their claws when she retreated. The Nahz-Solitaire duel was again inconclusive, and the Immortals lost two of their number but killed two Harlequins. Proper performance of the Necron elite troops. The Harlies used Hit & Run to get away and catch their breath. The War Walkers apparently were assaulted by the Ironclad Dread, and survived, at least for this turn. Ike's Deffkoptas had come out of nowhere and fired a few rockets off. The Chapter Smasher and his jump squad hopped into Nathaniel's deployment zone, between the Dire Avengers and the footslogging Wyches, attempting to keep the momentum of their assault going.
Turn 3 - NotFluff
The Farseer took one look at the Chapter Smasher, said "Wrong neighborhood, mon-keigh" and Jinxed him. Combined shuriken and splinter-rifle fire then swept the Marines and Chapter Smasher off the battlefield. The Raider up by Rynkelyh and the Inquisition warband unloaded its squad of Wyches, and the Riptide and Fire Prism scrambled forward and around the adjacent hill. The Wraithknight pulled back, possibly putting it out of range of the Supa-Kannons, practically the only weapons present capable of hurting it. There was a lot of shooting after that, from the Wraithknight, from the Riptide, from the Wave Serpent...the Stalker died, and less important troop models were thinned down. The Fluff side did control most of the objectives, however. The Harlequin squad re-assaulted Nahz and his Immortals, and this time the Troupe Master rockin' the mohawk challenged Nahz. Nahz accepted, they traded furious blows, and Nahz scraped by with one wound. You could say he had a "close shave". The Skyweavers and Reavers had wiped out our Orks on the left flank and now drove up our deployment zone, making a lot of noise with their guns, but not killing much.
GAME TURN 4
Turn 4 - Fluff
By game turn 4 the Fluff side was visibly gaining the upper hand. We had the objectives, our Orky fire support was intact and functioning. My Annihilation Barge is recorded as "running around" with no further explanation. This would be the Barge, longing for some action after its first and only shot at the Reavers, taking off after them at cruising speed. The Ghost Ark broadsided and wiped out the Skyweavers. The Razorback and Orks on the tall ruins took potshots at the vulnerable infantry in range, and the Tomb Blades and Deffkoptas (over)killed Shadowsun, gaining Slay the Warlord. The Destroyers on our right flank fought the Reavers and Wyches, and Nahz proved Necron dominance once again and slew Troupe Master Mohawk.
Ike charged Jain Zhar with the Deff Dred, and seeing that it wouldn't be a challenge for it to squish her, he had the Dred pick her up and bring her to Kobeh. Kobeh got his wish to duel Jain Zhar, resisted her disarming strike (yay for no Eldar Craftworlds codex at the time!), and defeated her.
At this point, Nathaniel conceded the game to us. The NotFluff side had got First Blood and Line Breaker for 2 VP. The Fluff side held three objectives (3 VP each), and got Line Breaker and Slay the Warlord, for a total of 11 VP. Fluff won!
 |
| VICTORY |
Epilogue, Fluff: the Orks got to fight, the Iron Hands brutally squashed their xenos foes, Rynkelyh complained about sitting in the forest the whole game, and the Necrons advanced their inscrutable machinations one step more. The Inquisition denied all involvement in the fight, and therefore did not lose an Ordo Xenos Inquisitor.
Epilogue, NotFluff: the Craftworld Eldar, after losing most of their valuable Wraith units, wondered why in Khaine's name they were here in the first place, and retreated to prevent further losses. The Dark Eldar had a blast engaging in excessively violent and/or masochistic activities, the Tau demanded recompense afterwards for their wasted troops and material, and no one knows what the Harlequins or random Tyranids sought or thought.
And here's all the extra pics. ALL of them.
Next time I'm taking video notes.
 |
| Xenos, xenos, and more xenos... |
 |
| ...and yet more xenos, and Astartes who clearly aren't too picky. |
 |
| The Harlie party getting ready to roll. |
 |
| Might be love blooming, might be a cheeky Deff Dred, might just be a traffic jam. |
 |
| An uncontrolled intersection in every sense of the term. |
 |
| "YEEHAW! CEGAROOOOOOOOAAAAAAACH!" "Bob, shut up, I'm trying to drive!" |
 |
| That's a mildly worrying sight, yes... |
 |
| No one here has any idea what's going on. |
 |
| "Come at me, you soulless wretches! All together or one at a time, it doesn't matter to me!" |
 |
| In this photo: people who want a good pasta, but can never dine on one again. |
 |
| "'ey boss, da Emprah's box is wif us dis time, right?" |
 |
| "Us, find a path? In this mess? You're funny." |
 |
| Getting a bit crowded here. |
 |
| Wraithlord wiped, note Dreadnought Don in center left. |
 |
| Wraithknight vs. Transcendent C'tan! One night only! Audience may or may not perish from crossfire. |
 |
| "Uh, guys? Guys? What about me and Grbblkdfkljkh?" |
 |
| There is only war. |
 |
| Pointy meets Choppy. |
 |
| Baharroth joins the battle. |
 |
| The traffic jam has still not cleared up. |
 |
| Scratch one C'tan. |
 |
| "Oi, o' course da stupid metal-boy battle-box trows a spring in da road!" |
 |
| Though injured, Don will not back down. |
 |
| Heroic morale! Most hardcore boy of the game. |
 |
| SHITSHITSHITSHIT IT'S COMING THIS WAY |
 |
| Baharroth's massive |
 |
| "Flank them, brothers, this is sure to work!" |
 |
| Been nice knowing you, Guardians. |
 |
| GET BACK FILTHY MON-KEIGH BOX |
 |
| "...oh." |
 |
| "Oi can shoot errything from up 'ere!" |
 |
| Well, this is embarrassing. |
 |
| Nahz challenges Troupe Master. |
 |
| Nahz owns Troupe Master. |
 | ||
A final sporting duel with a worthy opponent. 
|
